the truth about twins

As my first mother’s day approaches, I realize I have yet to share my thoughts on being a twin mom. This post is long overdue-it’s taken me nine months (oh the irony) to get my thoughts together on the subject (and they’re still not entirely together, not sure they ever will be). Discovering you are going to be a mother of two (at once) is an amazing, surreal and overwhelming experience. Becoming a mother is already such a major life-changing event, and adding multiples to the scenario grows it exponentially. My first reaction to our shock of a lifetime news (at 6 weeks) was ridiculously emotional-I instantly began crying and laughing simultaneously, and mr. fleurishing started crying and cursing! I wish we had it on video, because it was so hysterical…and so pure.

Being the anxious type A that I am, my mind immediately jumped to the all of the unknowns and “what-if’s” of twin pregnancy: can I/we handle this, is my body physically capable of this, will the nursery be big enough, can we afford this-the list goes on. My mind took off at a million miles a minute, and I got lost in google for weeks. I was excited, but at that point, mostly terrified, and found myself mourning the idea of pregnancy and motherhood that I had envisioned. One baby to birth, buy a crib for, to name, to bond with…ONE. Accepting the reality of twins was a long process, and it wasn’t until I heard them both cry that I allowed myself to fully believe it. It wasn’t until the 3 month mark that I could catch my breath, and start to enjoy being the mother of twins. To marvel at the miracle of them, and get enough sleep to stay conscious enough to do so! It was then that I realized how truly lucky we were (and are) to have this experience. That we were destined for this, and that the pros far outweigh the cons.

I’ll start with the cons. The pregnancy is very difficult, and often times, frightening (I had it easy compared to many). Once they arrive, you have to choose-choose a child to help, to console, to feed. It feels awful, and goes against every instinct as a mother. Having twins is expensive…no, you don’t need two of everything, but close. It takes longer to get to know each child, to bond with them individually. Finding time for yourself and for your marriage is difficult. While having children can stress any relationship, twins divide your attention and time by two. Twins certainly put you to the test, in every kind of way (especially when they start scheming as a team, oh boy).

I could go on forever about the pros.  You only have to be pregnant once for two babies-DONE! Double the cuddles, double the giggles, double the love. Henry and Marie are already best friends, and having a built-in playmate is wonderful for them and us, and they essentially start learning social skills and sharing in the womb! As parents, we never want for baby time, and in the case of boy/girl twins like ours, we get to see mars/venus exemplified before our eyes, which honestly adds an entirely new level of understanding on the subject. The efficiency is fabulous-we put away items as they outgrow them, teach them things at the same time, experience developmental milestones (mostly) simultaneously, etc…with them being the same age, it allows us single-mindedness when parenting. (I have great respect for my friends juggling a baby and a toddler!) Other parents (moms especially) tend to put you on a pedestal, which is both a good and bad thing. But having evenly beefed up mommy arms is super cool.

I’ve been told by some that I make it look easy (thank you)…but as you know, what you see here on the blog is usually not the nitty gritty of everyday life. We are still adapting to our new life, and adjusting to parenting twins…obviously we still have a world of learning to do. We get stopped by curious people often, and many say we have a “rich man’s family”….we are certainly rich in love. There are so many times when I look at them in complete awe, and wonder how I got so lucky. It is an honor and a privilege to be their mother and I cannot wait for all that is to come!

 

wishing my fellow moms (of humans + fur babies) a happymother’s day


 

 

Posted: | Tags: buzz, inspiration, motherhood, our twins
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favorites

It’s been a busy nine months, whew! Henry + Marie are now very mobile, working as a team to wreak havoc around the house. I did not include baby proofing items above, but the best money we spent so far is on magnetic cabinet locks (goodbye unsightly latches)! So much happens in 6-9 months…different for everyone of course but for us it’s been major-solids, crawling, standing, sleep pattern changes, teething, babbling, and now (assisted) walking! It’s enough to make your head spin, with twins. These items are their, and our favorites-so many of them are essential to our daily routines I don’t know what I would do without them!

 

1.    The Mamas + Papas Baby Snug‘s were excellent for supporting them when they first began holding their heads up, and we still use them occasionally for book reading or lounging.

2.    I feel like we all have a Sophie-or in our case, two, three, or four of them! They really are the best teether, and we have and love other members of the Sophie family as well.

3.   Once we started using sippy cups I experimented with a few brands but settled on the Tommee Tippee, especially since they were used to their bottles for milk. They’re pros with them now!

4.   We love everything by Plan Toys, but this percussion set is a favorite with both Marie and Henry!

5.   All the crinkly books by Jelly Cat are so great for babies, and easy to tote around in your diaper bag and/or car. Perfect for dining out distraction too!

6.   We are still using HALO sleepsacks at night, but switched to the non swaddle/wearable blanket kind around 6 months.

7.   Henry absolutely loves this xylophone…he is very focused and almost always goes to that toy first, it’s so cute. Future rockstar?

8.   The Stokke Tripp Trapp is worth every penny…comfortable, practical (not too many nooks and cranny’s for crumbs to find),blends with your decor, and grows with your child!

9.   Do you know about Pinhole Press? The names + faces board book is my new go to recommendation for all kids…the best!

10. We are exploring the world of baby food, and after starting out with purees at 5 months we still do a mix of them + solids. Earth’s Best + Ella’s Kitchen are our favs!

11.  The very popular Angel Dear lovies are the kids go to blankies…their nicknames are “bunny” and “monkey” so these are perfect.

 

Posted: | Tags: bebe, inspiration, kids, motherhood, our twins, small style
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nine months!

The nine month mark arrived on saturday…yes, I said nine. Wha happen?! (That one is for all the christopher guest fans out there.) Our latest shoot at Little Nest resulted in these keepers…I mean wow. These kids really know how to work it for the camera. They’ve grown used to it with mommy’s lens in their face from day one! At nine months, they are both very mobile and things are getting crazier…Marie is walking (with a walker), and Henry just began crawling, gaining speed every day. They make each other laugh often, and the babbles and sounds are becoming more coherent. Last night in fact, Marie crawled into my lap, looked up at me, and said “mama”. MELT. For the record, I now know the earlier one from Henry was a fluke (even though he looked at me and made the sound with purpose, he has not done it since)…so I await the day he says it again. Every day is a pure, joy-filled adventure!

images courtesy of little nest portraits

 

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reverie bébé

I’m so flattered to have our family featured over on Reverie Bébé! I’ll admit, revisiting my pregnancy journey and the precious newborn photos of Marie + Henry brings back such beautiful emotions, and moves me to tears. My sweet babies…has it really been eight months?! It is unbelievable how much and how fast they have grown!

image courtesy of little nest portraits

 

Posted: | Tags: bebe, buzz, motherhood, our twins, pregnancy, press
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jumping for oh joy!

Henry and Marie are ready for spring, despite mommy’s wish for more winter! It was the first time in their Oh Joy for Winter Water Factory outfits (ironic considering the brand name), gifted to us by the lovely Courtney Apple. It made my day to see that Joy added this photo to her facebook album!

 

Posted: | Tags: bebe, buzz, fashion, kids, motherhood, our twins, press, small style
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you are my wild

You are my wild is a weekly portrait project, with 14 different photographers sharing how they see their children. It’s making the blog rounds, but I just had to share…love the concept. Check out the site to learn more and be inspired!

 

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friday

Friday, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier to see you. This photo pretty much sums up the craziness, chaos (and cuteness) that was my week. With mr. fleurishing away on business, it was a true challenge. Babies crave routine (as does mommy these days), and especially with twins it is essential to stick to one. Between him being gone and our basement being renovated, this week’s routine went out the window. Which means I am completely spent. Done. Cooked. Exhausted. However…I realized that no matter how tired I am, every moment I am with them is a gift-I’ve never felt this happy.

*wishing you all a relaxing weekend*

 

Posted: | Tags: bebe, buzz, kids, motherhood, our twins
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notabli

I just discovered Notabli, and I’m obsessed. It is a brilliant way to keep all our your child’s moments and milestones in one place. As a blogger (and busy mother of twins) I have memories documented in many places-my blogs, facebook, instagram, twitter, now vine…and this gives me a way to organize it all in a way I can easily share with family. It is easy to use, grandparent safe, and best of all-totally private. I do recognize the irony considering I share so much online, but I am so thrilled to have one place to keep it all, safely and securely. Download it for free here!

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these moments

these moments…the ones that words cannot do justice…the ones we treasure forever.

My mom was diagnosed with breast cancer today, totally unrelated to me posting this (crazy). She has been told that surgery should take care of it, no chemo or radiation needed so we are very thankful. It is still very jarring hearing those words….I happened to be at my parents house when they got the call, and I’m glad I was. The realization that my health and the future health of my daughter being impacted is also on my mind, secondary to my mother’s health of course. It is all very sobering, and is a reminder to treasure every moment, every day. I love you more than words Mom.

 

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six months!

Six months…six months! Where has the time gone?! Our days continue to be filled with firsts…first foods, first kisses, first fights over toys (as demonstrated above, even though they each have their own sophie giraffe). Billy is such a trooper, and has dealt so patiently with first grabs! I have a feeling we will be saying the word “gentle” for many years to come, oy. They are such amazing little people, and witnessing their different personalities emerge delight us more than words can do justice.

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